Ever had gas so bad you didn’t know WHAT to do? How do you cover that up, you ask!

Have you ever lit a match to cover up the smell while you were dropping a deuce? While this is a perfectly acceptable way to disguise the smell in your own home, you probably shouldn’t try doing this when you’re on a plane.
Earlier this month, a flight coming from Washington D.C. heading to Dallas had to make an emergency pit stop in Nashville because fellow passengers smelt burnt matches. It turns out it was just a woman who had lots of gas and wanted to hide the smell. [via USA Today]

Wow, makes me think about what I would do if I were in the same situation. I mean we all pass gas, but why does everyone get all so up in arms when they smell someone else’s fumes from the doom. Is there really a proper way to get out of it gracefully?

Here are some options she could have tried:

Keep quiet. The other people next to her might have thought it was coming from someone else or that the stewardess did a drive-by fart.

Hold it. I think to a certain degree we all get pretty good at doing this. Over a lengthy flight though, she might have had trouble on this. I wonder if that’s healthy though to hold your gas in. It’s never felt right.

Blame someone else. She could have said, “Wow do you smell that? I think it’s coming from over there.” This could work, but we all know whoever smelt it dealt it right?

Create a :30 Diversion. Maybe she could have used a little misdirection like magicians do and started to have a coughing fit. Others might have focused on the coughing and by that time the smell would have dissipated.

Give and Go. She could have got out of her seat and walked toward the end of the plane and then while she was walking back let it go little by little.
Be honest and just let it rip. Maybe say, I’m so sorry but that Chicken Marsala is doing cartwheels in my stomach and is giving me bad gas. She might have got a funny look, but people tend to appreciate honesty.

It’s hard to fault her too bad because we’ve all been in a similar situation. If you’re traveling this holiday and have some gas, hopefully you can use some of those tips. Happy Holidays and godspeed.
Did you fart?

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Streets Are For People! are once again engaging the public and the government in an effort to disrupt our car-obsessed society.

To celebrate Earth Day, the group is preparing to present a “petition-car” to the Ontario Legislature at Queen’s Park. The petition-car — which has been stripped of its motor and painted white — is covered with over 4,000 signatures and bears the message: “We the undersigned do hereby demand that not one more dollar go to promote, support, or perpetuate car culture. We want bike lanes, public transit and a train system. We want our public space back. We want local food, clean air, sustainable industry, a liveable future for our children, and an end to oil wars. We want to dance in the street. We want a government that values life over money.”

The group’s formal petition asks the government of Ontario to redirect the tax-dollars spent on the auto industry towards expanding public transit, developing an integrated train system, and investing in pedestrian and bicycle infrastructure. The petition also asks the government to begin the process of weaning our economy off the automobile industry by shifting Ontario’s labour force into sustainable transportation sectors. Lastly, the petition also calls for a ban on car advertising, as according to Streets are for People! co-founder Shamez Amlani, cars “contribute to resource depletion, corporate hegemony, perpetual war, and urban decay.”

Click here to read the petition in full or to sign it.

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